Strengthening The Bond
PediatRx 07 | Late Nights and Lullabies 03
There’s nothing but chemistry here…
— Walter White.
Breaking Bad. S01E03
Throughout my college career and coming of age, I spent countless hours studying the delicate science of bonds, also known as, chemistry.
Nowadays, my focus has shifted away from elements and bonds to small molecules (aka drugs). As a pharmacist, I meet people for a living and get a brief snapshot of their lives. The highs and lows.
Working in a pediatric clinic, one common issue among new parents that I often see swept under the rug, is the difficult demands of maintaining their relationships, especially after they have their first or second child.
I get it. I’ve been there. You have a new baby, and your life, routines and entire world are flipped upside down. It’s a difficult challenge to maintain your responsibilities of caring for your newborn, whilst juggling thousands of other things the chaos of life throws at you. The last thing on your mind is intimacy or closeness with your squeeze.
Unfortunately, many men and women in this situation may seek help from a medical system, which will most likely provide a two-step solution. First, a diagnosis of post-partum depression or anxiety. Second, a prescription for psychiatric medicines. In some cases, this is necessary, especially if harm to the child is a possibility. However, in many cases, I would argue this approach is completely unnecessary.
Instead of dispensing drugs, I’d rather help my patients find alternative methods to survive and overcome their struggles with mental health, as opposed to just solely relying on quick fixes and prescription pads.
I’ve gone through the trenches, raising two under 2 at the heights of the global pandemic. Factor in a decade of studying and applying the fundamental principles of chemistry, I’ve realized one universal truth.
If the bonds we have built with our loved ones are to thrive and survive the ebbs and flows of life, we have to practice and communicate the language of love. Lucky for us, music is a great teacher.
During those late nights, when you’re rocking your newborn during witching hours, attempting to survive the sleep deprivation and exhaustion, you can find some solace in music and lullabies.
It worked for me. During those hard times, I found the best way to reconnect with myself and my baby, was to think of the tunes that made me think of my wife. Ones I could sing to my son, hoping the words falling on those tiny ears would embed a memory of how his old man felt about his beloved mother.
Here are some of the tracks, that saved me. Please enjoy.
Song: While We’re Young — Jhené Aiko
Link to Lyrics | Listen on Spotify | Listen on Apple Music | Listen on YouTube Music
Favourite verse
While we're young we should just have fun
We should just do whatever we want
And tell everyone that we fell in love with each other
That we found the one in one another
Jhene blends a majestic voice with beautiful lyrics. I was lucky enough to discover love when I was young, so this song hits home for me. The nostalgia from reminiscing about your carefree days with your partner, when it was all puppy-love and butterflies can help rekindle some of that familiarity you may be seeking.
Song: Trippy — Anderson .Paak feat. J-Cole.
Link to Lyrics | Listen on Spotify | Listen on Apple Music | Listen on YouTube Music
Favourite Verse
You and I will always be somewhere between
Sweet Trippy, I'm yours for the gettin'
Talking foolish, at the moon, I was gone, 1800 sippin'
I can't get rid of you, all the places that I used to go and kick it
All this weight that I'm liftin', trippyCome meet me in the middle, right there where you always be
Somewhere in between, you and I will always be
Come meet me in the middle.
This track is silky smooth. When you combine the instrumental prowess of AP with the lyrical flow of Cole, you’re guaranteed good music.
My main takeaway? Love is a compromise — you must always meet in the middle.
Song: Stand By Me — Ben E. King
Link to Lyrics | Listen on Spotify | Listen on Apple Music
This song needs no further commentary.
It’s a great lullaby. Poetic vocals. Slow jam. Beautifully orchestrated.
To all the Parents. All Mothers. All the Fathers. All the Wives. All the Husbands. Do your best. Forget the rest. As long as you’re together, you and your family will be able to weather any storm and overcome any obstacle. Stand by each other, you got this.
Thanks for reading.
Much love.
SG
Late Nights and Lullabies (LNL) is an ongoing series on this Substack. It’s my invitation to help the parents I serve as a pediatric pharmacist, rediscover themselves and connect deeper with their young children, using the power of music and dance. This is the third rendition of LNL, for the first two, you can click the links below. With kindness. SG
“PediatRx” is written by Dr. Shawn Gill, PharmD - a pharmacist and Father of two boys. During the day he works as a clinical pharmacist in family medicine and pediatrics, with a focus on deprescribing and helping his patients reduce their medication needs. At night, he writes this Substack. “PediatRx” is a collection of personal anecdotes and contemplative musings, crafted into a practical “prescription” for parents. The goal is to share insights, foster hope and inspire fellow parents to raise and nurture resilient children, in a post-pandemic world. To support this effort, subscribe below. Many thanks.
Shoutout: Happy Anniversary to my beloved. 9 years of marriage. 15 years together. You’re my mast, through the storms of life. Thank you for being who you are. Love. SG.